18 things I can say about him, on his 18th birthday.

one thing. i'm blogging about him again.

second thing. im kind of sad.

third. it's his birthday today. 18th.

fourth. i greeted him since its already the 12th of july here. but it's still 11th on there so yea its kinda an advanced greeting.

fifth. i dont know why i feel sad.

sixth. thanks! :)?

seventh. i didn't reply. what should i say? uh, np. :)? no way i mean there's nothing to reply in there right?

eigth. i want to catch up, know how things are going. but.. see, CHANGES.

ninth. years change a lot of things.

tenth. fact: havent seen him in 6 years.

eleventh. fact: we had 'something' before. but we were young. i bet it was nothing much. it wasnt the right time. i liked him. but when he courted me, i didnt like him back anymore. sry.

twelfth. im pathetic.

thirteenth. we've never been really close. i want to take this chance to be. but i dont know. it's just diff. i feel there's something different.

fourteenth. i'm talking about him again. this sucks.

fifteenth. i miss him. i care.

sixteenth. well. i hate to admit this but.. he's everything i wanted. i mean, if u just know him. if u could just talk, blog. like marie digby said on her song stupid for you, 'It's not everyday, that i find a person quite like you perfect every way. i finally found the nerve to confess that it's you - that i want`. i really hate to admit that.

seventeenth. i feeel he likes her. but she has someone else already. `don't know what to do` daw o. and putting up, `Leavin'` by J.McCartney on as a profile song? Comeon. :) Well. I say, he needs a girlfriend that he deserves. Should have a girlfriend that will compliment him. He's a sweet guy, such a swweett guy. He's like everybody's friend. He needs someone who will love him for everything that he is. He deserves that. Unless, he's an a-hole that i dont know of. But i doubt it. He's raised well. Boys will be boys, but he knows his virtues. :) :]]

eighteenth. He's the first person who made me felt I was special. He believed in me. I felt that. I was just too young to notice, I was too young to realize. I was too young to understand. I was too young to feel. I was too young, and so was he. But he believed in me. And I appreciate that. I now appreciate everything he's done. Letting the whole world know how much he cares and loves(?) me. Making me feel I was special. Letting me know that he believed in me. Letting me know that I can do this, I can do that. He was the first person to believe in me, in everything I do, in everything me. He accepted me, whatever I am, whoever I was. I was just too young to notice. And that kind of guy? You see, is everything I want. I need. But it's impossible now. That kind of guy, is a rare kind of species. Extinct, nearly. Lucky whoever will be his girlfriend. Lucky whoever will have him. Lucky whoever he loved, and will love.

And I was lucky.

I was just too young to realize.

And now I realize, imma sing, `If you just realized what I just realized then we'd be perfect for each other and we'll never find another.`

But it's not the same. It's never the same. If you don't feel it too.

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He cares. I know. :] It's just that, it's never the same. It will never be the same. Sad.

This is sad.

And I'm pathetic.